E192 Thinking, Reflecting and Being Intentional with Mo Issa

In this #jammingwithjason #podcast I speak with my friend Mo Issa about his journey of self discovery and finding what is really important in life.

I met Mo many years ago when we were both trained to be coaches by Brian Tracy and we have continued our friendship as our paths keep crossing. Mo is one of the most authentic, reflective and wise people I know, so thought it was perfect to have him on the podcast to discuss how to become more self-aware, intentional, and learn how to slow down and relax… things most of us don’t start doing until a mid-life crisis.

And I’m guessing you don’t want to have a “crisis” in your life to before you start implementing this wisdom, right?!

And of course, like usual there are lots of quotable lines and lessons for you to develop habits that help you live your best life and get the most out of your career.

How can you reflect more and be intentional in your life?

Learn more about Mo and sign up for his weekly newsletter at: mo-issa.com

Listen in at: https://www.jasonmefford.com/jammingwithjason/ or watch the YouTube video here.

Transcript

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Jason Mefford: Welcome to another episode of jamming with Jason hey today, I have a good friend mo ISA on with me and.

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Jason Mefford: it’s one of those where we’ve we’ve known each other for a while, but it’s been a while, since we’ve last connected and just felt like I needed to have him on the podcast.

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Jason Mefford: As we get into it you’re going to see why because he’s had an amazing career he’s an amazing man.

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Jason Mefford: And so, whatever you do hang on and listen to this whole episode because there’s going to be a lot of different things that are going to help you to improve your life and your career so with that let’s roll that episode.

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Jason Mefford: hey mo how you doing man.

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Mohammed Issa: hey Jason.

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Jason Mefford: it’s well it’s been it’s been a long time and it’s it’s one of those two where it’s like I mean we both know people all over the world.

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Jason Mefford: Right, I mean I think right we first met I think in San Diego when we were.

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Jason Mefford: Getting trained by Brian Tracy to be coaches.

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Jason Mefford: Right so right that was how we kind of first mad and and yeah I don’t I live in La so i’m not too far away, but you’re in Ghana right you had to come, like halfway around the world.

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Jason Mefford: To show up there and but what’s Nice, you know one thing that I love about this is when we go different places, we know people right, so it wasn’t but a year later, I was in Ghana doing a training and so it’s like hey mo let’s hang out and we did, and the.

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Jason Mefford: Right awesome right.

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Jason Mefford: Of course, and I think the next time I was there you happen to be in London that week, so it was like but anyway, but especially now with with you know what we have electronically, you know with technology it’s great because yeah we can just hop on and and talk, even though we’re literally.

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Jason Mefford: Half a world away so you know, one of the bringing on because I know I you know get your your newsletters guys and.

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Jason Mefford: And there’s there’s certain themes that you kind of talk about that I just love to write and so wanted to kind of kind of bring on I know.

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Jason Mefford: you’ve got a traditional brick and mortar business, but you also are a speaker and help help people as well, so maybe if you want to just take a minute and just kind of introduce you to everybody, I know who you are but everybody else doesn’t know yet so.

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Mohammed Issa: yep.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean, as you said that, let me start with because um I I traveled all the way to San Diego he said from Ghana and that’s that’s sort of that’s a trademark of of who I am because I am.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m originally from Lebanon in the Middle East and my parents immigrated to Ghana West Africa, and I was born here in Ghana and I traveled and studied in UK and came back to Ghana so i’m all over the place.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah I started my business brick and mortar 25 years ago and it’s.

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Mohammed Issa: it’s doing quite well.

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Mohammed Issa: But almost like was it 10 years ago when I started this sort of.

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Mohammed Issa: I call it the self discovery journey, where I started digging deeper because i’ve made money and i’ve lost money, I made money again and.

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Mohammed Issa: And money didn’t seem to answer all my questions, even though that’s how it’s brought up if you know anything about Lebanese and their history it’s like we leave our country we go out and a lot of them sort of aspire to make money, full stop so.

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Mohammed Issa: 10 years ago I went into sub discovery journey I started going travelling one of them was the San Diego with Brian Tracy where we met and I wanted sort of to read understand both myself more and to help other people, so I started.

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Mohammed Issa: Going into speaking coaching and writing which we’ll talk a lot more afterwards is sort of what the centerpiece for everything that that I became this new model is completely different and and revolutionary as compared to the old model.

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Mohammed Issa: And it all came because of me expressing myself on paper basically and.

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Mohammed Issa: Yes, so now fast forward 2021 I think it’s, eight years after San Diego and when we met and 10 years after we started after I started my journey.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m selling the same place sort of balancing both worlds, the the the typical businessman with with a hard nosed businessman.

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Mohammed Issa: Who has it.

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Mohammed Issa: As a team under him and living the other more authentic life and sometimes I feel like a hypocrite like one and I just.

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Mohammed Issa: Cut cut my my business.

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Mohammed Issa: connections and sort of live the life that I want, but it’s also.

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Mohammed Issa: difficult to do that because responsibilities bills and all kind of that so, so this is where i’m at at the moment but yeah definitely I sort of delve deep into the inner world a cross section between philosophy psychology and emotional well being so.

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Jason Mefford: yeah well that’s what you know to kind of touch on what what you talked about at the beginning, because this is this is true, I mean we see this all the time, I mean we’re both midlife you know and and we’ve experienced a lot of life already.

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Jason Mefford: And, and what you explained there at the beginning, you know you’ve made lots of money you’ve lost lots of money you’ve made lots of money right so again there’s so many people out there that think well when I finally make X amount of money then i’m going to be happy.

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Jason Mefford: Right or when I accomplish Why then i’m finally going to be happy right but that isn’t the case right, I mean that’s that’s what you found in your own journey, I mean that’s why 10 years ago you kind of you know woke up and had that I mean we call it midlife crisis.

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Jason Mefford: For a reason we live long enough and we realize hey the paradigm, or the model of the world that i’ve been living.

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Jason Mefford: is not making me happy.

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Mohammed Issa: Absolutely and and I think midlife crisis that the the actual phrase has a bad connotation it’s like heavily loaded.

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Mohammed Issa: But in reality it’s not about balding man and a red Ferrari.

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Mohammed Issa: Right.

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Jason Mefford: that’s that’s what everybody thinks about but yeah yeah yeah but but it’s not true because it’s a.

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Mohammed Issa: Time where where we sort of feel this quiet it’s not something that you depressed all the time, or are you really feel like you need to.

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Mohammed Issa: Go go on meds but but it’s it is quiet, the satisfaction that sort of give some like bugging you from other in the background right and it’s like i’m Okay, and I should be grateful, and yet i’m not so happy and that makes it like a double dose of.

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Mohammed Issa: of guilt right like Why am I not happy i’m feeling guilty I i’m okay i’m much better than maybe I don’t know 90% of the population and yet.

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Mohammed Issa: it’s it’s a time where you are reflecting it’s midlife it is mid July because you’ve sort of spent.

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Mohammed Issa: Several decades doing running achieving without even reflecting your thinking so something maybe an event comes along or maybe it’s quite the satisfaction that hits you and you start reflecting and thinking.

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Mohammed Issa: You know what if sort of slowing down, maybe i’ll start in June, maybe I can start seeing the actual flowers that I walk around with every day, which I never did 20 years ago.

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Mohammed Issa: And that’s a true story for me anyway in my mind that yeah.

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Jason Mefford: Well, which is why you know stop and smell the roses there’s a reason why all these little cliches and sayings come up right yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah yeah and I know cliche sounds so like boring and, like everybody knows what that, but that they are usually through right.

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Jason Mefford: Oh yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: If we can say.

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Jason Mefford: I have, I have to stop and remind myself to literally smell my roses out in the back okay.

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Jason Mefford: yeah i’ve got these two little rose bushes that I just love and kind of care for and yeah i’ve gotta stop and go outside and smell them and be grateful and just be present in that moment, it makes me feel.

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Jason Mefford: A lot better because yeah If not, we just get caught in all the craziness of life and and we just kind of forget and like you said, sometimes that leads that guilt will guilt is one of the worst emotions that we can feel we don’t want to.

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Jason Mefford: be feeling guilty.

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Mohammed Issa: Right yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah so so yeah I mean I mean and midlife crisis, a point of reflection, where where it’s like our old ways don’t serve our new being.

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Mohammed Issa: And it’s a time to realign our values like Maybe my and there’s nothing wrong about success and making money which was a big driver for me when I was young, but.

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Mohammed Issa: let’s say midlife or whatever it is something hits you and i’m realigning my van is like what really matters what i’ve only got 30 or 40 years to live.

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Mohammed Issa: Right, so what, what are the big prize that’s when you start thinking or what are the big things that I wanna I wanna I wanna I want to do in this in this world and it’s like.

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Jason Mefford: Well it’s interesting because, like you said you know that midlife you know we’re both at the point in our life, where.

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Jason Mefford: we’ve got fewer years left to live than we’ve already lived and so again it’s like shit what am I gonna do with the last 30 years of my life right.

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Jason Mefford: And, and you know, again I know a lot of people that are listening, you might not be as old as we are, but why are, why are we talking about this because we don’t want you to wait.

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Jason Mefford: Right don’t want to wait, as long as we waited either to start learning some of these things shake up you know, like you said, our old ways, no longer service.

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Jason Mefford: And this happens all the time is.

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Jason Mefford: We get caught in these routines we get caught in these patterns and it’s not actually helping us get what we want right, and so we actually have to change.

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Jason Mefford: If that’s what we’re going to do, and I know that’s that’s what you’re helping people do that’s why you’ve been writing books that’s why you’ve been speaking, is to try to help people kind of come out of that So how do people come out of it.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean.

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Mohammed Issa: At the end of the day it goes all goes back to self awareness, I mean whether it’s reading a book or listening to a podcast or going to a Tony robbins event.

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Mohammed Issa: All these things are not going to change transform your life you’re going to have to do it right, but there are at least a point of.

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Mohammed Issa: Reflection a point where you start asking yourself questions, am I happy, am I satisfied is our reading I want, what I want to do.

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Mohammed Issa: And and it’s not always easy, especially for younger people because i’ve spoken to a lot of younger people and they say that you know what you’ve you’ve.

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Mohammed Issa: you’ve sort of spend your life doing an acting and now it’s our time so so when we get to your it’s maybe we’ll start asking the question but.

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Mohammed Issa: But as you were saying, I think, once we start sort of and today’s is a great I mean podcast everywhere blocks everywhere courses are online today’s is a great place for information, which is only going to be a springboard for you to start thinking and reflecting.

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Mohammed Issa: And the more you do that, the more you’re intentional and that’s that’s the point that maybe the younger people should look at i’m not saying stop chasing money or stop chasing your dreams, but be much more intentional, what do you want from life.

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Mohammed Issa: Like what the social media wanted to know you know, like that and that’s another issue, maybe we’ll speak about not just social media, what about the meeting environment because I feel like.

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Mohammed Issa: Even with with me when I realized my values, a lot of my values were not even mine, they were either by my parents or my environment or or the media popular culture so.

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Jason Mefford: yeah did you see that a lot and I wanted to bring up because you used a couple of words, you know about thinking and reflection.

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Jason Mefford: Right and I know you know because i’ve spent a lot of my career teaching training people right because, because I have a passion for learning.

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Jason Mefford: Every single day i’m learning something new folks right i’m listening to podcasts i’m reading books i’m i’ll go down the rabbit hole on Google, you know about different things, I mean one of my favorite things to do, which is kind of weird is my wife, she she brings in all these.

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Jason Mefford: into our playlist all these movies, based on real life, so we watch a movie based on real life, and then I like spend a half an hour trying to figure out what actually really happened right who were these people, what is this wall I didn’t know that right.

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Jason Mefford: So i’m constantly learning every day, but what a lot of people don’t realize and those words that you used is learning.

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Jason Mefford: Is not the same as acquiring knowledge right because, again, we can read all the books, where learning comes is in that reflection.

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Jason Mefford: And in the actual exercising and practicing right, so you can read all the books, you want, you can listen to all the podcasts you want, you can go to all the Tony robbins type events.

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Jason Mefford: But unless you actually do something about it, unless you stop and reflect and incorporate that into your life and until you start doing something different.

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Jason Mefford: it’s all for not right you’ve wasted your time reading if you’re not going to do anything about it and i’m sure you’ve probably seen that in your life and with other people you’ve worked with too right.

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Mohammed Issa: Absolutely, I mean I mean I can even I remember when I went to the I went to a Tony robbins event he made us walk on fire, which is amazing, and we really did there’s no scams or anything you did he puts you in such a state of mind that you do you live, I left on the Sunday.

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Mohammed Issa: The whole week, I was wow man, I was on I don’t know what we were on.

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Mohammed Issa: Something something good, and I could sort of.

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Mohammed Issa: build the universe, and the way I felt and then it’s sort of slowly drops away because you have all these dreams, all these aspirations, but we’ve.

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Mohammed Issa: we’ve not sort of put them in concrete we haven’t taken any action towards them it’s a good place and, as you said, action is key.

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Mohammed Issa: there’s an anonymous code that says action is the language of god’s basically so you can you can read as much as you want, you can, if you don’t actually.

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Mohammed Issa: emotional eyes it put it into your nervous system actually act on it nothing’s going to happen.

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Mohammed Issa: And for me, nothing sort of the only changes that I could say that really helped me was was when I started incorporating habits, creating systems and habits and writing being key one of them, that really I started seeing change in my life.

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Jason Mefford: Well, in that you use the H word right habits which I love I love that word, and you know again it’s a word that usually gets bad connotations.

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Jason Mefford: Because when we when we say the word habit, we think bad habits right like you gotta break all these bad habits, but you forget that a lot of the action is those good habits, so what are those good habits that you need to do.

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Jason Mefford: You know, in order to you know, be able to get what you want, and I love that I hadn’t heard that that quote before action is the language of god’s.

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Jason Mefford: Because well you know what’s interesting is a lot of people think well if I just hope and wish and pray for it, then you know everything will just happen right, and I think it was, I think I heard the story from jack canfield, but it was you know about this guy who wanted to win the lottery.

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Jason Mefford: And so every week, he would pray he’d go into the church and he pray you know God.

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Jason Mefford: Please help me win the lottery right and so he can go in every week and he do that prayer and, finally, he was in there one week and God, you know he’s sitting there praying praying praying and God comes on it’s like my son all right, I heard you but go buy a lottery ticket, then you know.

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Jason Mefford: That excuse me that.

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Jason Mefford: If we don’t actually take some action it’s just hoping and wishing and praying and that.

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Jason Mefford: So you do have to you do have to take action.

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Jason Mefford: Now I know you’ve you know you’ve written I think multiple books already I think you’re working on one one now right but that’s that’s one of those where a lot of people say they want to write a book.

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Jason Mefford: But what does it actually take to write a book you actually got to sit your butt in the chair and do it right.

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Mohammed Issa: that’s it exactly and and writing i’m sure you we all right and you’ve written before and it’s such a it’s not something that’s easy such a difficult task to do and it’s but.

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Mohammed Issa: it’s not.

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Mohammed Issa: Hard per se but it’s difficult because you just need to sit your butt down and do the after writing for one hour every day or half an hour every day, and if you do it consistently, you can have a book and the end of six months is as simple as that.

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Mohammed Issa: But it’s that initial sort of initial taking of the action that that is the hardest time I always find and going back to the habits.

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Mohammed Issa: And for me what what 3D was a cornerstone habit and change a lot of things, for me, was I started rising early like one hour earlier than anybody else in the House around five ish and, I would first thing i’ll do is.

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Mohammed Issa: I sometimes meditate on and off sometimes I believe I become a Buddhist monk and.

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Mohammed Issa: Other days I just.

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Mohammed Issa: I don’t believe in it anymore.

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Mohammed Issa: it’s that simple, but I go back I what has stuck with me the biggest habit is journaling.

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Mohammed Issa: So every day in the morning, I get up I journal for.

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Mohammed Issa: I follow Julia cameron’s the artist’s way procedures just right out three pages, whatever comes up and usually it’s about.

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Mohammed Issa: What i’m grateful for the past few days, what my desires are how badly the day went, for example, what were my flaws Why did I explode in the middle of in the middle of the road on somebody cutting me up.

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Mohammed Issa: On my dreams and my goals and sort of I found that habit which which i’ve maintained for i’ve barely missed days i’ve maintained for more than seven years now it’s sort of this expression of my inner self really has helped me.

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Mohammed Issa: establish what we’re talking about that the thinking and reflecting and the actual learning the stage to get into action.

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Jason Mefford: Well, and it’s it’s you know what you said, hopefully, everybody that was listening heard that most been doing that for seven years folks that’s a habit right and, at the beginning, it wasn’t easy i’m guessing right because, like you said, the initial.

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Jason Mefford: is usually the hardest point right you until you do it 10 times 30 times in a row.

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Jason Mefford: Your brains trying to sabotage you and getting you to stop to do it right, so you got to push through that initial time until you develop it as a habit now i’m guessing it’s not hard for you to get up in the morning and do that right.

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Mohammed Issa: Absolutely it’s it’s a joy actually I mean I get up early and I look that’s, the first thing I look forward to.

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Jason Mefford: yeah well it’s like you said, I mean you know, having these we never accomplish as much as we’d like to in one day.

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Jason Mefford: But, over the course of 90 days or a year we accomplished a lot more than we ever thought was possible, if we’re consistent right and like you said you know if you get up every day if you write for an hour every day in six months, you actually have a book.

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Jason Mefford: So, again for people that want.

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Jason Mefford: to write a book that’s what you do right you got to get up you got to actually do it, you got to be consistent with it long enough.

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Jason Mefford: But all of a sudden, you have it, and you’ve accomplished your level Now I know we were talking before we hit record, you know that there’s there’s some other stuff that you do around that with writing with book to kind of bring some music into this as well.

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Jason Mefford: right that that you kind of have like a whole little practice that you go through, as you do that so maybe just kind of share with people because, again, this will be another way that people can incorporate music and other stuff into their life to help them get what they want.

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yep.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean for me to get into writing to the that flow famous word balance become like a second one of the most famous words right flow to get into flow or in the zone, whatever I I kind of music I listen to it’s sort of neoclassical music it’s.

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Mohammed Issa: I don’t even know their name, sometimes I just go to spotify and I have a playlist which I use every time it’s the same playlist it’s sort of.

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Mohammed Issa: Music without words sometimes it’s a piano sometimes it’s a violin and it’s it’s sort of engages my mind like white noise in the background, but at the same time doesn’t take a lot of.

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Mohammed Issa: My thinking mind energy and it helps me sort of relax and get into the flow and and I just start writing immediate like I put on the headphones whether it’s yeah the airports now and it’s like magic it works, obviously with a with a cup of strong coffee.

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Jason Mefford: Is 5am yeah yeah like.

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Mohammed Issa: Like strong coffee is going to do the trick yeah.

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Jason Mefford: Well, and it’s you know because that’s that’s one of the things to that as people you know just to share with you, you know some of those things that you’re doing in psychology we call anchors right so.

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Jason Mefford: Right, so what ends up happening is again.

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Jason Mefford: You get up every morning, you have a certain routine and you’re anchoring activities with some of these different things you do putting on your headphones select that playlist you’re listening to the same playlist every day right.

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Jason Mefford: Those things are anchors that kind of help you get into that stayed that’s going to make it easier for you to actually do your writing as well right, so I do the same thing there’s.

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Jason Mefford: there’s really about like three to three different playlists that I listened to most of the time.

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Jason Mefford: i’ll get up you know first thing in the morning there’s there’s some music, I listened to, to help me kind of wake up, I have one that I use to get me excited and started for the business day.

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Jason Mefford: And I usually have one at night that I listened to that helps me kind of calm down and relax so that I can sleep well right.

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Jason Mefford: Okay, and so it’s it’s you know you’re doing the same thing that you can actually use music as a way to get you.

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Jason Mefford: To both help you do the habits, but also get you into an emotional state right.

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Jason Mefford: Because again i’m sure that you know the neo classical music that you listen to works for you, it gets you in that certain state that you need to be able to right now, if you were listening to heavy metal it’s going to get you into a different state right.

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Jason Mefford: Again, yes I love heavy metal but it that’s not what I listened to first thing in the morning or right when i’m going to bed right because I need to be in a certain state so i’m helping music to kind of get me into that particular State right.

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Mohammed Issa: Yes, yes, I mean when I work out I work out four days a week or five days a week, and that’s different kind of music it’s it’s more electronic electronic house kind of music the 3D.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m seeing i’m shopping yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah.

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Jason Mefford: Well, and it’s great and it’s, you know as we talk about you know some of the stuff that.

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Jason Mefford: You know you’ve been working with and how you’ve been trying to help people to I wanted to kind of see is there.

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Jason Mefford: Is there kind of a common theme that you see to with you know when when people.

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Jason Mefford: Even like you said you know you kind of get to that point and it’s like you’re not really satisfied with with everything that’s going on.

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Jason Mefford: Are there some tricks of some things that people can do to kind of help get them out of that and get them kind of moving forward as well does everything kind of have the same root cause at the end of the day, or is there.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean it’s all rather subjective because everybody has his own sort of deep issues which he has to work out.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean, I really believe that we all come with certain Oh, we develop certain issues which we are supposed to work out right.

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Mohammed Issa: My issues are different to yours your upbringing was different to mine but having said that, I really feel like what is common to all of us is that.

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Mohammed Issa: Life is just too fast, we really need to simplify things much more now that the amount of information, the amount of things that are happening around us, I don’t think we are our brain was meant to handle all that so as much as we can, we can slow it down simplify our lives.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean if you can go become more mindful is the word but it’s so difficult practicing.

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Mohammed Issa: The mindful meditation ways, but but, but just simply simplifying things whether it’s your phone being silent at night or taking a day off your phone is off for the whole day one day a week or something.

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Mohammed Issa: Or whether it’s just not reading any of your newsletter it’s anybody’s news that is for a week as well.

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Jason Mefford: Except for most read his every week.

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Mohammed Issa: I was just gonna say that.

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Mohammed Issa: Mr believe that.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean that’s quite uniform I just think we need to slow down.

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Jason Mefford: Well, because yeah and it’s interesting that you say that because there’s another there’s another story that i’d heard that kind of illustrates this is.

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Jason Mefford: You know, in the beginning, the gods got together and they said hey you know we’ve got this really valuable thing that man needs but we don’t want to.

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Jason Mefford: We want to make it hard for them to find and so one of the gods says well let’s let’s put it at the top of a mountain.

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Jason Mefford: Because they’ll never find it there now you know they can climb up the mountain they’ll probably find a way to climb up the mountain.

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Jason Mefford: Okay, well, what if we buried at the bottom of the ocean they’ll never get it there well know they’ll probably find out way.

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Jason Mefford: Right to get to the bottom of the ocean and find this and, finally, one of them goes why don’t we put it inside the man and the rest of it like ah they’ll never find it there.

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Jason Mefford: that’s so so that’s kind of what you’re saying to right is this this slowing down because what’s amazing is, as you slow down, you have these.

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Jason Mefford: You know reflection points.

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Jason Mefford: that’s when we can go into ourself and usually you know it’s like the wizard of Oz you know, at the end, she you know she clicks her heels together and the wizard said you’ve always had the power to do that, it was always with you.

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Jason Mefford: And it’s it’s it’s kind of the same way, you know you we see it.

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Jason Mefford: In Star Wars.

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Jason Mefford: In the forest right trust the force well, the process is in us right and so as we take that time to slow down to reflect to go internally.

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Jason Mefford: We can access that and that’s that’s where a lot of that calm comes and like you said you’ve got your stuff to work out i’ve got my stuff to work out there, different things.

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Jason Mefford: How are we going to know we got to get quiet and figure out what it is for us that we have to do and that only comes from slowing down and having that reflection the mindfulness the you know, turning it off for a little while and letting letting it come through.

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Mohammed Issa: and turning in golf means also because of.

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Mohammed Issa: The deluge of all this media around this and people we’ve become like similar to each other, like I like the same thing you like, he likes it.

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Mohammed Issa: there’s no individuality anymore you feel like everybody likes or dislikes or that is a big polar.

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Mohammed Issa: polar opposites right so we’re not taking enough time to really what our value Do I really like baseball just because 10 of my friends like Do I really like it or Do I really like this new writer who came out or is it because.

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Mohammed Issa: The new Yorkers activism stroke.

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Mohammed Issa: are really pushing.

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Mohammed Issa: pushing the writer, to be famous because of some political reason.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean that’s this that’s why, when you slow down, you get to know what what who are you who do you want to be, and who will really authentic food the truth authentic authenticity of yourself.

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Jason Mefford: Well, and that’s that’s sometimes a very hard.

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Jason Mefford: Hard thing to go through right and so again that word like authenticity comes up a lot, because you know we all, we all are different, we don’t have to have to like the same things and it’s okay.

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Jason Mefford: I just because everybody else loves the last movie or the last book that came out if you don’t like it you don’t like it it’s okay.

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Jason Mefford: Right, yes I think personally that’s what makes the world so much more enjoyable for me is the diversity of people likes dislikes opinions other things like that that actually make it, you know if we’re if we’re all the same it’d be a boring place right.

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Jason Mefford: Imagine if ever, if everything in the world was the same color.

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Jason Mefford: boring would that be.

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Mohammed Issa: Right it’s it’s true but, unfortunately, and especially now, I feel like the younger generation it’s like everybody’s so afraid to give their opinion, otherwise they’re going to be.

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Mohammed Issa: trolled on Twitter or cancel I mean it’s it’s just ridiculous.

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Mohammed Issa: And it’s still harder for them to beat themselves, I remember Oscar Wilde quote like be yourself everybody else is taken.

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Jason Mefford: Right I love that that’s one of my favorite quotes it’s on my on my refrigerator.

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Jason Mefford: In the kitchen yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah but.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean, are you really being yourself that I mean that’s where that’s where we that’s where we need to read ask the questions and sure we’re going to be a lot of the time is going to be hypocritical, we want to be something, but we can’t.

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Mohammed Issa: We are we pressured but it’s a process it’s an authenticity is a journey it’s a process it’s not a it’s not oh I press the button and become authentic all of a sudden.

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Jason Mefford: Were that easy right the pharmaceutical.

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Jason Mefford: yeah but he’s would have come up with a drug already for that.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah exactly.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah.

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Jason Mefford: Well, no, and it’s it’s you know, maybe that’s where we can kind of spend just a couple minutes here before we before we wrap up because I think it’s it’s.

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Jason Mefford: You know that that self acceptance side of it, you know I think is is sometimes what is so hard for people and and psychologically it’s you know with cognitive dissonance if if you, you know believe two things simultaneously you end up going crazy.

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Jason Mefford: Effectively right and so.

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Jason Mefford: You know the problem is like you said a lot of times it’s you know and again when we were younger, we wanted to be cool we wanted to fit in we wanted to wear the right clothes say the right things, I mean there’s there is that tribal need.

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Mohammed Issa: For inclusion.

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Jason Mefford: Right, in fact, one of the biggest human fears is to be excluded right so that’s why i’m trying to fit in so much, but trying to fit in when you don’t really fit in causes a lot of psychological problems.

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Jason Mefford: For people as well right.

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Jason Mefford: yeah and and being honest about what it is that you really like what it is that you really need what it is that you really want.

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Jason Mefford: is like I said, sometimes you know we wait until mid life, most people wait until mid life to start asking themselves those questions, we should be asking those questions earlier as well.

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Mohammed Issa: I think I agree.

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Jason Mefford: Because that’s that’s more of the key to you know you’ve been 10 years into this journey, do you feel like you know yourself better now and you’re much more comfortable now than you were at the start of the journey.

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Mohammed Issa: Oh yes, oh upset okay.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m nowhere near close like like I would want to be, but I look at I just compare myself from where I was before.

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Mohammed Issa: and definitely and and you touched on self acceptance and I think the root the root of everything is about self love and self compassion that we I don’t know what happens to us, but when we were babies, we all love each ourselves and each other but suddenly something goes wrong and.

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Mohammed Issa: This inner inner talking comes in and we start sort of.

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Mohammed Issa: Not loving or not accepting ourselves.

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Mohammed Issa: And even through the last 10 years i’ve went through a lot of ups and downs, like my over the past, maybe three or four years, my business really went down so i’ve had to focus a lot on it and rebuild it and and even after all my.

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Mohammed Issa: Work in a work and stuff and I went through phases of my life of these months that are that are thinking why Why did I mess up what happened, I was supposed to know ABC and D what happened for me to and Why did I.

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Mohammed Issa: lose my my business touch or whatever, so I really sort of went through self loathing and and for a while and and then.

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Mohammed Issa: All of a sudden, I started working through them, it was obvious I was going to go through this path because of my obstacles when I was brought up.

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Mohammed Issa: There are certain issues which have not been resolved and and and now i’ve been resolved, and I should really be an I am not so much grateful Now for the bad times I suffered because i’m.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m a different manner and much more vulnerable I can immediately, I can tell you about on what my thoughts are maybe five years ago you criticize me i’ll be arguing with you within seconds so.

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Mohammed Issa: See you see what what the journey, does the self acceptance i’ve accepted myself.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m not perfect, all of us and we’re all human humans, after all, and we’re going to mess up we’re going to continue to mess up every month, every year, but the trick is not to do the same mistake every time right that’s that’s.

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Jason Mefford: yeah we’re trying to learn so we’re not making the same mistakes.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah that’s that’s that’s the key that’s key, I think.

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Jason Mefford: Well, and that we don’t need to be hard on ourselves when we make those mistakes either right because, again, is that’s that’s where.

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Jason Mefford: You know, for me, because, especially the last couple of years i’ve been working on this more too.

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Jason Mefford: Because you know at first when when somebody like well it really all comes down to kind of self love and self acceptance, you know, five years ago, I would have said bullshit no that’s not true.

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Jason Mefford: Look, I I I don’t have a problem with that I feel like i’m fine, but then again in those periods of reflection, when I would make a mistake.

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Jason Mefford: And I would hear that internal dialogue, and I would hear how I was talking to myself, all of a sudden, it became quickly clear.

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Jason Mefford: That maybe I didn’t love myself as much as I thought I did, because what I talk to someone else that I love the same way that I was talking to myself and the answer was no right because a lot of times I was being very critical.

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Jason Mefford: of myself and instead of realizing that look mistakes are a part of life there in the past we learn from them, we grow.

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Jason Mefford: we’re probably going to make some mistakes in the future, but that’s okay right because, who I am right now is, who I need to be right now to learn the lessons that I need to learn, right now, so I can be that different person tomorrow.

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Mohammed Issa: that’s so true absolutely right yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: roomie roomie famously said, your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it that’s.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean, he wrote that I don’t know how many thousand years that’s still, the key to key to everything it’s like we what we, as I said, we were babies were gone we love each other, we love everyone there was so much love and suddenly all these obstacles grew.

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Mohammed Issa: between us and love.

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Mohammed Issa: that’s that’s that’s the key.

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Jason Mefford: reminds me because one of one of my coaches right, one of the people that’s coached me.

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Jason Mefford: reminded me again right because a lot of times we always think it’s about what we’re going to get right.

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Jason Mefford: So what am I going to get the next thing the next growth, the next whatever right and and the point was when are you going to realize it’s not about what you get.

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Jason Mefford: it’s about what you give up.

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Jason Mefford: it’s about what it’s about what you let go of right so so you bring in that about those boundaries right and so again at metaphorically right there was pink floyd’s album the wall.

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Jason Mefford: I mean that was all about this man, creating brick by brick this wall that separated him from everybody else right, and so we all are doing some of that each day, are you adding a brick to your wall, or are you taking it away.

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Jason Mefford: Because I mean that roomy quote is amazing because that’s the point right is what barriers are we putting in in our in our way to say that i’m not good enough or.

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Jason Mefford: I can’t do that I can’t have that i’m not worthy of whatever and so it’s not about what we’re getting but what do we let go of so that we can receive more.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah I like that quote by a coach and what know what we get the what we give up right yeah.

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Jason Mefford: And sometimes that’s hard you know, for me, because again it’s like What do you mean, I have to give up something.

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Jason Mefford: Well, we have to give up something to get something new right the whole idea of the classes already full can’t put any more, water and if it’s already fully you got to get rid of some of the water before you can put more in.

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Jason Mefford: that’s what we have to do, metaphorically in our in ourselves as well right.

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yep.

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Mohammed Issa: yep totally.

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Jason Mefford: Good stuff good stuff I always love talking to you.

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Jason Mefford: yeah but I know we gotta we gotta end up wrapping up because we can’t you know people got to get back to other things too, but I do always like to ask a question when I can is you know again we’ve we’ve talked as men in our mid life.

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Jason Mefford: But if you if you could go back now right if you could tell that you know 20 something mo what advice would you give them to help them in in you know, in his career and in his life, you know that you wish, you would have known back then.

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Mohammed Issa: I mean i’ve thought about that a lot and i’ll say just.

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Mohammed Issa: slow down smell the coffee smell the roses relax nothing is gonna go away, nothing is so urgent.

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Mohammed Issa: We grew up so young, like, I remember mice I want to do this, I want to go here, I want to do this and then you end up doing and doing and doing and not enjoying anything.

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Mohammed Issa: Just sort of chill relax, and I say that and I don’t mean to relax, meaning that you have no no goals, no, no, but still done nothing is going to nothing is going to go away.

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Jason Mefford: No, and when we because it’s the same way, I mean again we’re we’re both at the point where or kids or adults and it’s.

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Jason Mefford: You know how many times have I heard of parents say oh I I just can’t wait until they grow up and then so many parents once they grow up it’s like Oh, I wish the kids were little again right.

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Jason Mefford: it’s it’s almost like you know.

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Mohammed Issa: that’s me that’s me.

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Jason Mefford: Talking.

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Jason Mefford: yeah but it’s it’s it’s.

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Jason Mefford: You know yeah to just slow down and realize that everything’s okay it’s you know you’re not going to miss out your.

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Jason Mefford: Your on exactly that hat that you need to be on and and what’s again interesting is.

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Jason Mefford: You know how many there’s there’s tons of stories about this, where people are working and working and working and working so hard right and then, finally, they.

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Jason Mefford: They burn out they do whatever they have to step back and then all of a sudden boom right some inspiration comes to them something ends up working its way out, but they never would have gotten that if they didn’t continued in that rat race.

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Jason Mefford: And so it’s you know slowing down and relaxing.

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Jason Mefford: I gotta keep reminding myself to do that too.

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yeah.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah yeah.

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Jason Mefford: Well, this has been great thanks thanks for coming on like I said I always love talking to you, I appreciate you.

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Jason Mefford: How can people reach you how’s the best way for people to get hold of you and be able to get on your newsletter and see when your new book is coming out.

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Mohammed Issa: yep anyway thanks.

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Mohammed Issa: thanks for the speaking and and I really enjoy our conversations as well.

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Mohammed Issa: my blog is more dash isa.com.

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Mohammed Issa: Mozart idol is a.com and.

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Mohammed Issa: instagram and Facebook it’s at more dash ISA.

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Okay.

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Mohammed Issa: yeah and yeah the news, the news that I go on the blog you just got it yeah my new book, hopefully, will be available next year, so.

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Mohammed Issa: i’m hoping middle of next year, so let’s see what happens.

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Jason Mefford: yeah I know it’s been good, and like I said yeah reach reach out to him he’s been.

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Jason Mefford: And don’t wait to get as old as we are before you start thinking about some of these things.

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Jason Mefford: Because then life has passed you by and, and again I mean it’s you know i’ve been on the path i’m supposed to be on because it’s made me who I am.

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Jason Mefford: But there’s there’s a reason why some of the older people try to help give advice to younger people too, because we don’t want you to make some of the same mistakes we did.

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Jason Mefford: If you don’t have to write as well, so.

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Jason Mefford: Well, thank you probably have to have you back again, but thanks and we’ll see you later.

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Mohammed Issa: Thanks thanks take care, have a good weekend thanks.

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